Adoption is a wonderful choice for many couples, but it isn’t for everyone. IVF and surrogacy gives same male couples another way to start a family.
The surrogate may be someone the couple knows – perhaps a friend or a sister – but the egg is donated so there is no genetic connection with the woman carrying the baby. The sperm can come from either parent, but unlike the US the sperm cannot be mixed. For all these decisions the couple and the surrogate are given counselling.
IVF and surrogacy
The Naked Scientists recently featured an interview with Bourn Hall IVF dads, Matt and Gary. To listen to the interview, visit The Naked Scientists’ website here. To read the original story, take a look at our Your Stories page here.
Matt and Gary considered adoption, but decided early on that it was “not a route we wanted to go down”, and began exploring other options.
That’s when Gary’s “amazing” sister-in-law, Ollie, stepped in! “She sent me a message, and said if we wanted to go down the surrogacy route, she would be honoured to carry the baby. It’s an amazing thing to do and we will never be able to thank her enough.”
Since Ollie was Gary’s brother’s wife and donated eggs were used there was no genetic link to Matt or Gary. It was therefore a difficult decision who should be the biological father. While Gary admits it was a “tough decision” at the time, he says it doesn’t bother him now they are a family that Matt is the biological dad. “You just go through so many different emotions during the process: excitement, anticipation, fear. Ultimately, you know it’s our dream come true.”